Breakthrough

Emilea, I've been working on my story and I'm trying to write it in chronological order minus a lot of details, so I eventually have the framework of the story written down and I can add in extra stuff later. But last night I had to get this scene out of my head and I still had a week of storyline to go, so I skipped that week (bad Evelyn!) and started writing. And it startled me! You know how some authors have this plot worked out in their heads but when they start to write it down the characters change it around? It happened to me. It's so cool! But now I'm feeling a little apprehensive and I'm wondering if I should keep it. Could you give me feedback? I'll summarize what's already happened and what will happen after this scene for you. Thanks!

Summary: Cecily has been at the children's home for a week. She has met Will, Ashelyn, and several other orphans and has opened her dad's entire library for them to use. She kinda likes Will even though she just met him, and Will has told her that he wants to show her something and talk to her. Oh, and Justin is her dad, not a previous boyfriend (not that ten-year-olds have boyfriends a lot. Or maybe they do).

Scene:

Will led her through a door at the end of a hall and up a winding staircase. He held firmly to her arm, a lot like the way he had held her hand when they first met. Only this time he didn’t let go. Cecily thought about asking him why, but found out a second later when she stumbled.

“Careful there,” Will whispered, holding her tighter. He smiled reassuringly at her. Cecily smiled back weakly, her heart pounding in fear. If he hadn’t been holding on to me, I might have fallen all the way down!

As they resumed their climb, Cecily thought again about how Will reminded her of Justin. The way he held her made her feel secure, like Dad’s hugs; when he read to her and the other children, his voice sounded like Dad’s; the way he smiled…

A rush of cool air brought her back to the present. Cecily was surprised to see stars so close, she thought she could touch them. Will had brought her to the roof of the children’s home. Along with the initial thrill came apprehension.

“I’m not sure about this, Will,” she said, taking a step back. Her arm dropped to her side, away from Will’s touch. “This could be dangerous, right? And won’t we get in trouble with Leah or Alice?”

Will grinned. “What the dear little ladies don’t know won’t hurt them.” He reached for her hand and tugged it gently. “Come on, Cecily.” He stared into her eyes. She stared back and wondered if he could see what she felt. She was sure that wonder and excitement and some anxiety were visible her eyes. But most of all they reflected trust. Complete trust. This boy of twelve years wasn’t her dad, but was extending his friendship and care to her, just like he had reached for her hand the day they met. “Leave them behind for a moment and share a secret with me.”

Cecily longed to say, Yes, yes! I’ll go with you. Something held her back, though. “Why me?” Her voice sounded small and unsure.

Will kept a hold on her hand but seemed uncertain of what to say. Eventually he shrugged. “I don’t know,” he admitted. He squeezed her hand tighter. “But I know that there is something about you that’s different. I—”

“You’ve known me for a week, Will,” Cecily interrupted. “That’s not much time for us to build up trust, for us to know each other.”

“Yeah, I know,” he said impatiently. He stamped a foot with frustration. “Everyone says that, even Ashelyn.” Will paused for a moment. “Didn’t you feel something when we touched hands, though?” His voice had softened and carried an emotion that Cecily didn’t recognize. He bent down and leaned forward, their faces almost touching. He was whispering now. “I know I did.”

Before she realized what was happening, he had wrapped his arms tightly around her and was kissing her. Cecily gasped when his lips met hers, but it was covered up by his mouth. She protested at first, until her heart started rushing with excitement and she felt so full of new emotion that she kissed him back. Then she thought about what was going on. It was her first kiss, and very different from what she had heard from her friend Jena and seen in movies. First kisses were supposed to be incredibly special and wonderful and anything but what she was experiencing. She was leaning back uncomfortably and couldn’t move, and Will's mouth was wet with saliva. Cecily soon figured out that she wasn't enjoying this and tried to pull back. Will only held her tighter and kissed her with more passsion.

She couldn't stand it any longer. She took her arms from around his waist and shoved him hard. Finally Will let go and faced her.

What Cecily saw terrified her.

The emotion she had heard earlier in his voice was replaced by another in his eyes. She couldn’t find a name for it, but saw what it conveyed: anger, disappointment, some hurt. He had realized, just as she had halfway through their kiss, what emotion he’d had in his eyes.

Infatuation.

What hurt most, though, was the curve of his mouth that said, What was I thinking? This is just a kid, a little girl, a naïve, inexperienced ten-year-old. He was mature, and she wasn’t.

Cecily soon found anger too. Who was he to imply that she was immature? He had initiated everything! Sure, she had felt a little infatuated too, but until this moment, this sweet, innocent kiss gone sour, she hadn’t acted on it. What had Dad read out of Song of Solomon? “Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.” She had known that she wasn’t in love. Why hadn’t Will waited?

Tears streamed down her cheeks. She felt cold and abused, and she missed Justin all over again. She pushed past Will and ran down the winding staircase, tripping a few times but ignoring the pain. She burst through the door at the end of the hall, not bothering to memorize the hall’s number. She wouldn’t need that door again. Not if it led to Will.

In her room, Ashelyn was typing away furiously on her laptop. She glanced up when Cecily came in, not planning to say much more then a greeting. Then she saw the blotches on her friend’s face, each one representing hurt, confusion, anger, grief. Mistrust.

“Cecily?” she asked cautiously.

Cecily burrowed under the covers without even pulling her shoes off. She choked out, “Tell your dear brother that his secret is safe with me.” She didn’t know why she said it. Maybe because, beneath all the whirling emotions, she still had a soft spot for her new friend’s brother. Or maybe because the only way to change anything was to be what Will was not.

Note: What do you think? I kinda like how it turned out. I definitely wasn't planning for this. The scene on the roof was supposed to be the two really defining their friendship. Instead it's...this. Eventually they end up together, so I'd have to find a natural way for them to become friends (it's already forming in my head). But seriously. Does it make sense for Will to kiss her after knowing her for a week? I know that happened to Erin and me and then we broke up, so it's possible. But for a ten- and twelve-year-old? Please comment! And maybe when I finish chapters one and two, I can send you all of the story via email. Luv ya!