Rejection to Unbreakable

I've been thinking about my relationship with God. For the last few years I've been very aware of Him, but not necessarily making Him a priority. That usually happened at camps. I'd last for about a week before going back to my pre-camp life--mostly without God. Whenever I realize that this is happening and that I really love God, I get frustrated with myself. Why does my flesh reject the One I want to love the most?

Then I read this book called The Host. It's a Stephenie Meyer book and it's really amazing. It's about Wanderer, a soul that inhabits a girl named Melanie's body. Only Melanie doesn't fade away like she's supposed to. She stays, and her thoughts begin to affect Wanda's (Wanderer's) thoughts. Wanda ends up falling in love with Jared, Melanie's boyfriend. Then she meets Ian, and finds that she loves him more than she loves Jared. But she can't love him because Melanie's body rejects anyone but Jared. Here's an excerpt from close to the end of the novel:

[Ian asked,] "Is it so unbearable to have me love you? Is that it? I can keep my mouth shut, Wanda. I won't say it again. You can be with Jared, if that's what you want...."

"No, Ian!" I took his face between my hands..."No. I--I love you, too. Me, the little silver worm in the back of her head. But my body doesn't love you. It can't love you. I can never love you in this body, Ian. It pulls me in two. It's unbearable."...

He closed his eyes again. His thick black lashes were wet with tears....

Oh, go ahead, Mel sighed. Do whatever you need to. I'll...step into the other room, she added dryly.

Thanks.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled myself closer to him until my lips touched his.

He curled his arms around me, pulling me tighter against his chest. Our lips moved together, fusing as if they would never divide...and I could taste the salt of our tears. His and mine.

Something began to change.

When Melanie's body touched Jared's body, it was like a wildfire--a fast burn that raced across the desert and consumed everything in its path.

With Ian it was different, so very different, because Melanie didn't love him the way I did. So when he touched me, it was deeper and slower than the wildfire, like the flow of molten rock far beneath the surface of the earth. Too deep to feel the heat of it, but it moved inexorably, changing the very foundations of the world with its advance.

My unwilling body was a fog between us--a thick curtain, but gauzy enough that I could see through it, could see what was happening.

It changed me, not her. It was almost a metallurgical process deep inside the core of who I was, something that had already begun, was already nearly forged. But this long, unbroken kiss finished it, searing and sharp edged--it shoved this new creation, all hissing, into the cold water that made it hard and final. Unbreakable.

I know that was a long excerpt, but could you see it? If you think of Melanie as our flesh, Wanda as our soul, and Ian as God, it's very similar to our Christian walk. We long for God, but reject Him at the same time. Still, there are moments that we can shove our human nature away and have close communion with God. It won't be until we have our new bodies that we can really connect with the One we love.

There's something powerful about connecting with God, no matter how you do it. You can read your Bible or pray. You can also put in a worship CD and sing and dance for Him. Shove all thoughts away and, for just an hour--which isn't much time at all--praise God for everything. Make an effort to be with Him. It's so worthwhile.

You know how The Host ends? (Don't read this if you don't want to spoil the ending.) Ian loves her so much that he gets her a new body, one without Melanie or anyone else in it, and they get this perfect love that can't be blocked or broken. That's how it will end for us one day. And really, that's just the beginning.